Wormholes: how not to die

1. There is no way not to die. You are going to die.
2. Possibly quickly.
3. Protect yourself from financial ruin by buying and hiding in a PoS
4. Protect your PoS from ruin by having stront and 2-3 weeks of fuel, at least, at all times.
5. Never enter an outgoing or incoming WH without either a fully insured unfitted ship and an alternate route back in, or a scan probe launcher and a shitload of patience.
6. Did I mention you are going to die?
7. The directional is your friend. But it’s a shitty friend. It’s a way around getting ganked so the gankers have ways around it. Expect to die.
8. If you find yourself outside your PoS for any reason, be aligned to a planet.
9. Don’t forget to cloak when scanning.
10. There are people who get their giggles by killing people like you. They are, statistically, much better at killing you than you are at not being killed.
11. Never leave your PoS without some method of getting back to it from highsec. This usually means having a scan alt logged off in system or in the PoS.
12. If you don’t have a scan alt, you may as well kiss your assets goodbye and start waiting for PoS fuel notifications as your base dies cold and alone because you got podded and didn’t have a damn scan alt.
13. Any WH connecting you to somewhere else is a potential threat. Be aware of incoming WHs, because someone opened that door straight to you and you better believe that they’re gonna use it.
14. If you see a ship you don’t recognize on the scanner, run. And possibly alert anyone you happen to be with.
15. If your corp mates say run, run.
16. If your corp mates start shouting, run.
17. if your corp mate types a sentence fragment, spelled poorly, consisting of any two of the following words, run.
“Sisters””fuck””combat probes””probes””directional””crap””dead””podded””run””any ship name you or he is not currently flying””back to pos””damnit””ANYTHING in capslock””gibberish”
18. Pick some symbol on your keyboard, like # or %. Rename all the ships at your pos with that symbol. If you see a ship without that symbol, run. Warning, easily countered.
19. NEVER assume that the designated Dir scanner dude is scanning. If he has a heart attack or takes a piss, you’re fucked and he could just say they had good scan ships.
20. Did I mention you’re going to die?
21. Getting whatever you came for safely inside the PoS does not mean it’s safe. Get it to Jita first, then call it safe.
22. Anchor your hangar and maintenance array next to each other. Bookmark one of them and call it “PoS” warp to it in case of speedy ship swap.
23. Heavy interdictors are small ships that mean you can’t run away, and by the time you see one on the scanner, you’re already fucked.
24. DO NOT BRING A T2 RIGGED FACTION FIT HULK INTO A WH, YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT IF YOU DO SO.(Yes, this has happened. Lost it in under 3 hours. No, it wasn’t me.)
24b. Hell, don’t bring ANYTHING faction fit or t2 rigged unless a) you’re rich enough to buy two more of em or b) you don’t believe in Murphy’s Law.
25. Do not rig your hulk with drone mining augmenters or cargo expander. Use low-friction nozzles, they decrease align time and have saved my ass when there was literally a second difference between getting scrammed by a Loki and getting away.
26. Active tank for sleepers, buffer fit for PvP, mix of both if the site isn’t too hard for gank insurance.
27. If you are attacked during a sleeper run, target the ship and try and scram him. If you didn’t bring scrams to a sleeper fight(understandable) shoot him. The sleepers will eventually switch to him.
28. If a corp mate types”Hey, is that your ____” start aligning and getting up to speed with the nearest celestial until clarification is obtained.
29. If you see a scan ship on the directional, scan again and it’s not there, do not assume that he has left, or so help me I will tear a hole from my WH to yours through sheer rage and beat you over the head with a cloaking device.
30. If you live in a class 5 wormhole, remember iambeastx has a static class 5 entrance and will find you…. eventually. Assuming he figures out how to work a scan ship.
31. If you came into the WH to fight, there are people in here already that fight better than you. If you came here to mine, watch out for the first two groups.
32. Some people will build carriers and rorquals in places that mass limitations would not usually allow them. If a carrier drops on you in a C3, don’t be surprised.
33. Carriers can get into C4s, but not easily and only from a nullsec or incoming link from a C5 or C6. Don’t be too worried.
34. When in a C5 or C6, be worried about carriers. One carrier can shut down an entire mining op until they get bored, and a carrier w/ support fleet can screw over anything else. Except…another carrier with support fleet. Have fun.
35. If your PoS has no guns, jerks will shoot it. If your PoS has guns, they will send interceptors to extinguish your ammo. If you employ webbers, they will warp out and rep. If you employ warp scrammers, they will spider tank. The goal of a WH pos is not to destroy but to annoy the fuck out of. If they have a small force, then they’re not a problem for a PoS. If they have a large force, then they’re not gonna be bothered by a few turrets. Employ shield hardeners, SB ops, and jammers to make them lose interest.
36. Have the max amount of strontium. Or you will regret it.
37. If you afk outside the bubble of a PoS, you will probably die. If you’re cloaked, you may get uncloaked. It happens.
38. C1-C2 are soloable with few skills. C3s take some skills, C4s require two people and RR, C5s require at least five people and C6s require at least ten attentive people.
39. You are going to die.
40. Do not bring implants into a WH and expect them to last over a week. I bought a set of +3s, they lasted 3 months, then I got podded twice in the same 3 days.
41. Skilled scanners can scan out a mining op and only have the probes visible to you for seven seconds. And in the WH, the scanners operate. Make the connection?
42. Never assume that the ships you see on the scanner are the only ships in the wormhole.
43. Whs will make you obscenely rich, assuming you can find an unoccupied one, not get ganked within the first week and get whatever you came for out of the wh.
44. A wormhole in your system is not active unless you or someone else warps to it. Do not activate your static WH unless you need an exit, or you’ve got one more route people can use to find you.
45. By popular opinion, a drake is a good, cheap ship for running up to class three WHs. Don’t forget, popular opinion in an internet spaceship game doesn’t mean much.

To date, I’ve lost two hulks, a covetor, a vexor, a thorax, several Itty Vs, two pods, three domis and a large tower to the WH.
BTY if anyone finds the tower “Calculated Risk” floating in a C6 somewhere and can get me a route there, drop me a line.
45. Don’t type a blog post while mining in a C6.

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18 Comments on “Wormholes: how not to die”

  1. Jaggins says:

    All True! (These facts contributed to my current 0.0 life after 5 months in W Space…)

  2. Spectre says:

    This list is about 36 items too long.

    • miningzen says:

      no points for thoroughness?
      I’ll be the first to admit that the list could be boiled down to:
      1. You’re going to die.
      2. The directional will give you a heads up to inexperienced gankers.
      3. try and survive long enough to make a profit to buy a new ship once you die.

      BTY, didn’t you quit or something? I stopped paying attention once my entry didn’t make it to the second round.

      And a three-point list wouldn’t be very funny >.>

  3. […] (for the same reason contract listings do but market information doesn’t?) and I came across this article. After skimming through a couple of the points by the Capsuleer using an a channel called […]

  4. Gukumatzz says:

    LMAO so true, you cant truly laugh at this post unless you have lived in a wormhole for anytime. My corp had a laugh :)

  5. taoi K says:

    LOVED IT. The corp moved into a class three a couple of days ago. Your posts have really been helping us. Keep them up!
    I wish we could get our corps together to make some ISK!.
    Fly Safe

  6. 45/45 for truth, though I have yet to see a cap ship in wormspace.
    Though I’d add a couple more
    46. If you’re going to be decloaked, you’ll be decloaked while scanning so you can’t tell.
    47. That scan alt you left in the WH can get podded too.
    48. You are going to die
    49. Never attempt a C5 or C6 solo
    50. Never bring more than one cap into a C5-C6
    51. Keep at least one full refuel of strontium in storage
    52. You and your corpmates are not the only ones who can leave a cloaking scanner alt in a WH
    53. You only need to be within 5,000M of a WH to jump through (saved my life many times
    54. Do not trust russians
    55. You are going to die
    56. Never leave your salvager unguarded while you move on to the next site
    57. If you see a Heavy Interdictor on the scanner GTFO.
    58. If all seems lost, launch all sisters scan probes and blow up any wrecks.
    59. Always fully insure your T1 ships, especialy the Orca.
    60. You are going to die

    Own personal WH losses
    4 Drakes
    1 Rokh
    1 Raven
    2 Hulks (see 52.)
    1 Orca (see 52.)
    1 Badger
    4 or 5 pods
    a number of frigs

    Total WH kills
    1 Stealth Bomber
    Many sleepers
    Many roids

  7. katsumi1980 says:

    Cool post. I posted a rough overview of my w-space experiences as well. From living in a C6. I find w-space living quite well, though it can take it’s toll on ya after a while.

  8. Pen Star says:

    Gor Blimey as always, great post! Always good for a chuckle and a wealth of information. One day when I get past level 2 missions (ho ho) hope to be doing this kind of thing.

  9. […] Great, now I’ve gotta beat myself over the head with a cloaking device. […]

  10. there are only 3 things in life which is stable…
    1) if you have ANY income.. someone is gonna tax you..
    – why ? .. cause they can …..
    2) At one point or a nother.. youre gonna die
    – Why ? .. damned if i know.. but you will……die that is…
    3) I can’t tell someone’s identity from their typing style.

  11. Wiu Ming says:

    Excellent post – mandatory reading for anyone thinking about entering a system that may be next door to a system that may have a wormhole within 5 jumps of it.

  12. […] back from our scout, leaving me unsure what to do. I have experience of miningzen’s excellent tips on w-space surivival and know that ‘if your corp mate types a sentence fragment, spelled poorly, consisting of any […]

  13. […] you know how to watch the directional scanner like your life depends on it and you really, really know how things work in there, but, yeah, […]

  14. Klann says:

    “45. Don’t type a blog post while mining in a C6.”

    petition CCP to label all C6 systems “here be dragons” why don’t cha? lol.

  15. Lucas says:

    So fun! Laughted a lot in here! hahaha…

  16. Tekka says:

    Very entertaining, thank you.

    PS – I didn’t die….

    ….yet

  17. TurAmarth says:

    Latecomer to yer blog… Damn Good! My corp cut our teeth onna C1 and setup our POS inna C2 shared with an Allied corp. That was 6 months ago and we have lived there ever since, and from the way things have settled in, we may never leave… =]

    And we has died there, many times…. but we has also KILLED here!! The night we were onlining our POS we were attacked by a lone Loki… he killed 2 Indies and my Hound. We were able to jump back to our Allies POS, reship and return and he then quit the field…

    The FF went up and I had to log. My coprmate and allies stayed on and 3 hours later, they killed Loki and a fren of his in a Geddon that came back to try and bash our POS…

    We have loved every second in here since… =]

    “Six Months is a Hole, Changes a Man.”

    http://turamarths-evelife.blogspot.com/2011/06/positively-amazing.html


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